Tuesday, May 19, 2009

An evening walk

Again after a long time I am writing a blog. I did not want to leave big gaps between two posts, but I am too lazy to write a blog. This time i want to get rid of the philosophical mask i have worn.

Warning : All faint hearted, short tempered people and people with high expectations please stop here . This post might be a big disappointment, I am honest about this. Continue at your own risk.

It has become a regularity me forgetting some thing, on that day too i forgot my wallet which had house key. As I would be the first person to reach home, I needed the key. It was a gloomy day, rain threatened to break the shackles of the cloud any time. Thinking that i would get key from my roommate as i have done last week, left the office in regular 6 pm cab risking a 1.5 km walk amidst rain.

I had to get down near my roommate's office. Somehow survived the accidental attack from my colleague who was not expecting anybody else other than him to get down from the cab there. Admiring my anticipation and reflex I landed safely. As soon as I got down , cool breeze welcomed me to the real world, out of the cardboard cabinets filled with artificial lighting. The breeze is the best thing about Bangalore, it made me forget myself and I felt that i could not ask anything better than that in the whole world.

Coming back to reality, called my roommate(I had my cell phone, I only forget one thing a day). Sweet voice informed me that the subscriber i am trying to reach has switched off his/her mobile. Called one more guy staying with me to inquire about when would he reach home, he said one hour. I was thinking what to do for an hour , going to Total Mall was an option but i just had 13 rupees. I did not want to go there without purpose. I have decided to walk slowly and kill as much time as possible.

Time was 6:55 pm , clouds have sent the sun home early, who was supposed to be doing over-time. The city was trying to defy the clouds effort to darken, with artificial lights and achieved it too. Thunder announced the arrival of rain loudly. Cool breeze with slight drizzle took me to the ethereal world again. The small trees by road side were dancing to the tunes of breeze. Breeze was helping the trees shed extra load because of the rain, next time when the breeze the trees were moving as if it is saying thanks. Far ahead in the sky nature was organizing a mega size laser show with lightnings. When I was thinking humans can do better than this with multiple colors, another lightning came like countering me telling white consists of all colors, this time it was even bigger and powerful .I conceded defeat . As all this was happening the people were moving so fast beside me, in cars, motor-bikes, bi cycles etc.

I walked 20 mts which approximately took one minute , a ground-nut retailer was coming in the opposite direction. After checking I have enough money (Last time when i forgot my wallet i did not have any money), stopped him , bought ground-nut for 5 Rs. An old man roughly aged 65 also stopped by and bought ground nut. I thought he will walk slowly , probably i can talk to him and walk, but he was too quick for me he outpaced me comfortably. The old man well equipped against rain, he had an umbrella probably he cannot afford to have a fight with rain at this age. He was not carrying anything else, probably he was going for a walk.

I walked at the same pace (20Mts/min) without heeding to my ego's calls when a old woman overtook me.I was enjoying the cool breeze and trying to understand what could have the wind told the trees to make the trees so happy that the trees were laughing ecstatically. Same time a pair was coming opposite to me, the girl was laughing to whatever the guy has told. It was more like a girl laughing to "whatever stupid thing a guy tells". It is amazing to, how strong this opposite sex attraction can get. One more pair overtook me and sped past me, this time girl was talking the guy was listening inconveniently and clearly the girl was over powering the guy, who told women are weaker sex ? They are stronger indeed. With in next few minutes few more over took me ranging old women to yo boys . It was really good to watch everybody around and their actions.

After twenty minutes my thoughts were about the people rather than on the wonderful climate, still did not forget to enjoy the weather. I was wondering where are all these people going as fast as they can? Am i the only one who has nothing to do ? With no aim ?. The next scene made me think more on this. Traffic signal was showing red , all people were waiting with hatred. They were so unhappy at their speed being attenuated by signal. A guy on motor-bike riding and was talking to somebody in cellphone. Probably he wanted to be double quick and was doing two things at a time stopped at the signal two feats behind a bus, again making me wonder how can be people so busy. A cyclist took the opportunity and caught up with the other fast moving guys, he pushed his front wheel between the platform and the earlier mentioned motorist's back wheel. The gap was not even a feet but was good enough for a bi-cycle wheel, bi-cycle's front wheel and motor-bike's back wheel were almost parallel. Probably he thought this way he got nearer to his goal of getting motor-bike. Probably he was too busy to waste the time spent to travel two more feats.

I proceeded with the thinking of "why did i not want to go faster" few rain drops touched me. The rain again changed my focus (I have already told no philosophies today). As soon as few drops fell down the situation changed, everybody started moving faster and people were too keen on beating the rain from drenching them. Still a guy approximately 24 years of age was waiting anxiously near the signal looking at the road in front of him. May be he was waiting for some body important. Few meters away a lady was coming out of ISRO and was waiting for signal. It looked like , She did not want to give up any of her important duties(professional work and being a mother) so took her kid to the work place , trying to satisfy all, a typical Indian mother.

Rain finally made some serious attempts to reach and cool earth, I liked rain but my cellphone and hands free might not like rain. Went to a near-by petty shop bought a plastic carry bag for 50 paise and put all my antiaqua stuffs into that and did not collect 50 paise change. I moved on as two funky looking guys (typical metro politan) trying to heat themselves with a smoke and in the process broke the law too. The different strategies people were employing rain was interesting, one guy used a cap, a lady used a carry bag, many girls using their thuppatta as masks and few used hands and ofcourse people with umbrella. 

Rain started pouring, I slowly walked past the bus stop in which ~ 50 people who have taken shelter from the rain.  Cool rain water made my ever hot (strictly means temperature) body dissipate some heat through my eyes.  A girl looked oddly at me , I did not know what she was thinking. What could she have thought about a guy in rain walking as slow as he can with his hands in packet, shivering in cold heads looking down, may be she could have thought I was very sad because I failed in my exams may be love failure. And may be she was looking at my new hairstyle, thanks to the rain playing hair designer role.

There were no more people seen only me and the rain. Nature was trying to frighten me with heavy showers, loud thunders and cold wind. Though i was shivering and felt the disadvantage being a warm blooded animal, I still maintained my speed. An old man was walking in the rain not showing any urgency, we shared a glare "which said oh we are of same breed". I saw a tree in which few branches were broken. I realised one more danger now, rain can fell a tree or atleast break the branches, but there were not much trees after that. Two men stopped their bike in front of a tree and using the tree as shelter, without realising the danger i just discovered.


 A tree was bending down , as if it was frightened by the loud thunder and asking me too to respect.  The rain water has formed several streams and flowing beautifully. The yellow colored light from sodium vapour lamps made those streams look like a stream of gold. The rain halted the traffic and gave them the opportunity to see what is going around.  There were several rain drops in my spectacles affecting my vision. When ever I looked up little rain drops and sodium vapor lamps gave me an illusion that I am in a cave full of treasure. This made me realise that I was looking at people with such prejudiced eyes and passing judgements about them.


   I walked on after about 150 meters I had to cross the road, there rain water was rushing into a drainage hole. It was as if people on an open place being attacked by gunmen rushing into a building with one entrance to take shelter. I entered the small lane to my home. Greedy trees were trying to catch and have all the rain water themselves, but failing.  Trees and buildings were playing broker roles in between sky and earth, taking as much as for them selves before actually giving to earth, just like our politicians.I have slowed down further as my other room mate has not crossed me, did not want to reach home before him without keys. Now the wind became a socialist  plucked all the rain water trees had in their leaves and giving it to the ground. But yet the water have to fight the tar roads to actually reach the earth. A guy in car tried to hasten me by splashing the water in the pits, I did not give up though. I could not walk any slower, I reached my house after 70 mins of non-stop 1.5 kms walk, feeling beaten.


 I dejectedly climbed the steps and reached my flat. There was the first twist in the tale, lights were on some body was inside the house, I knocked he opened. One of my room mate was working from home on that day.

I will be really surprised if anybody who has read till this point and not disappointed at reading this. Anyways thinking on why I wrote this, I just felt like writing.

On an unrelated note, what is important to win in IPL ? Is it good fielding ? good bowling ? good batting ? or all of the three ? If your answer was any of the above it is totally wrong, "momentum" is the most important for winning in IPL. You would have got this if you regularly watch IPL post match talks with players.

Bye for now.
P.S: The above incident happened on last Tuesday and this is my fastest blog just 2 days :)..

Monday, November 10, 2008

Do you beleive?

After a year I am writing a blog.I have not written anything for a year because I did not have any thing to share with others.In the last few weeks some interesting things started happening in my life.Interesting things are just interesting things which i do not want to classify as good or bad.

Most interesting thing that has happened to me is that I had to move to airport road which is quite far from my office. And it takes atleast 75 minutes to reach my office. Situations have forced me to subscribe for the regular cab. I have to be at the stop by 8:15am.If I miss the cab then I will have to travel almost 2hrs , which also
includes 3 bus switches.

I have moved to a house of 6 interesting guys again just interesting, including me. We had a couple of interesting discussions , thats what made me write a blog now. Almost a month ago, after Kaly's untiring efforts and accurate planning we went to coorg (Kodagu). Kaly had booked a nice place for us to stay,on the banks of a river (We never knew whether it was cauvery or some small river). Dubare or something that sounds like that is the place where we stayed.I was astonished by the silence of the place. Even sounds of the river and the birds merged with the silence so silently , which stunned me and I could not think of anything. I understood the power of silence, mind in complete silence I felt something which I have never felt before. Anyways this post is not about the tour, the blog is about an interesting conversation we had there.

My favorite hobby is to think about the eternal questions , "what is life?","why am I doing this?" and so on. Life is very easily explained by almost all religions. But I cannot accept this since I do not believe in God.
Then I was thinking about the purpose of the religions . The more I think the less I believed it. There is nothing superstitious in it. Once upon a time some philanthrophic (?) wise men/women thought that humans should have morales to survive or not to destroy themselves. This should have been like quantum theory of this age, they would have tried to explain to everybody and make them understand.As always not everybody understands everything, and they do not even want to understand. The "wise people" had no choice but to frighten them.They formed the religion and created God. This is my theory about religion. There you go the best invention of humanity was done "The God" .

This is a pretty simple theory everybody would have thought about this. Back to the eternal question "What is life", how do I find the answer. I do not believe in religion because , it does not explain events satisfactorily. Everybody (atleast almost everybody) who thinks like this become a fan of science which explains things very well and explains it satisfactorily.Eventually me too turned to science for explanations, which explained events certainly better than religion.

Whenever my mother told not to do something I have asked "why should not I do it?" , she will have no answer for the question, I said it is all rubbish and done with that. Science has taught me to ask questions , never taught me what to do when answers are not given(My science teacher might have forgotten it). May be it tells to find the answer, and find the answer in science. My ever doubtful mind doubted science too. After all isn't science a belief too?

Then I asked myself "How does science differ from religions/sprituality ?" The answer from my colleague during one of the conversations is that science can be challenged and religion cannot be challenged. It is not always the case , science can be challenged only in scientifical ways. Say for an example, an Ayurveda expert goes to scientists and says Ayurveda can cure a disease which the modern science cannot cure.Then the scientist how does it work, Ayurveda expert starts explaining it in terms of pitha,kapa,vatha etc.The scientists will say this is all rubbish.Then someday one scientist would take this up and analyze and start explaining all this in terms
of modern scientific terminologies, then it becomes "scientifically" proved. I too have experienced this , me and one of my friend had a discussion on something , I started explaining it without using a "scientific theory" but almost similar to it since I have never read about that anywhere else.My friend could not accept it, and explained the same thing with the "scientific theory".

Ayurveda too is a science , yet the modern science cannot accept it , just because it does not understand that language and that particular science.May be it could be because of the reputations of the modern scientists and they are considered as the authoritative sources. Same thing is applicable for religions also when religions were very powerful they wanted things to be explained in their own terms, and conflicting things were neglected or out powered. Always spiritual leaders challenged and changed the religious/spiritual practices.
Science claims that the scientific theories or not just beliefs , anybody who wants to learn can understand/feel/see it. Science is so fascinating because it proves simple phenomenons in front of your eyes, or something which satisfies your senses.It explains complex phenomenons too or rather explains it in complex way, it proves with extra sensory instruments. Its complexity keeps increasing. Along the pyramid there would be very few who would be understanding it all. What does ultimately scientists want to achieve ? , Thanks to Varun the scientist for the answer , it is trying to find a theory which will explain it all, it is called GUT (Grand Unified Theory), may be that is God.

Spirituality claims that there is a path which will take you to God,at least few have realized "The God" and that will answer to all questions , this can somewhat be translated to scientific "Grand Unified Theory". Should I believe this ? Should I believe this not? . As I kept thinking, the answer was if I can believe science I can believe this too . I learned science by believing it may be most of us it did that way, I believed that 1+1 = 2 , 1*2 = 2 then (a+b)^2 = a^2 + b^2 + 2*a*b was proved using beliefs. In similar way I can believe the claims of sprituality or any other theory too, and so you can believe in God too. Nowadays I do not question the existence of God using silly questions like can you show me the God etc etc. I just believe it and if I have to realize God I have to believe and take a path somebody says. Spirituality/religion does not cheat more than science does. Not everybody understands rocket science and so not everybody can understand God .

After all in schools I (we) believed lots of scientific facts, just because somebody has told and somebody
has accepted it.These beliefs later backed by more complex scientific facts and became real or stronger beliefs. There is always prerequisites for everything so there can be prerequisites for religion/spirituality and other theories too. We cannot just dismiss something because we do not understand. Nowadays I do not ask questions to my mother , I just try to understand why is it being told, I feel this better, rather than being ignorant and confident about what we think. Science can make us blind believers too and is already making us. I learned to believe, and believe in beliefs generally rather than believing a particular belief :).
This post has (or just) excerpts from various conversations I had with Suresh,Harihara Subramanian (samy),
Varun(the scientist), Sandeep, Raja Kannan.
Next time I will write a less philosophical post, which most of us would have studied in schools.
Note : The editor used for writing the post is vim, the most powerful text editor.
PS : Thinking is injurious to health.
PS2 : Thanks to Google for those Ayurveda technical terms , I do not know the meaning. Thanks to science for giving Google :) .

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

The Four Heroes

It has been around 3 months since i wrote my last blog. It is always tough to maintain a balance in life.My mind is riding on two horses, traveling in opposite directions.Always one of the two horses is not at full strength so i concentrate more on one thing and forget the other, and suddenly the other one will wake up and take my mind to its direction.I know its precarious trying to travel in two horses , but i want to continue doing it until i can.
Yesterday as usual i woke up and around 8.30 and after finish reading every word of cricket news in the sports page and glancing at the headlines for the sake of doing it, took bath and after a long discussion with myself i went to an eatery near-by for breakfast(which has become a luxurious thing for the past two years).The mess name which I do not want to mention is say Muniyandi Vilas ( a name which is very famous in the southern TamilNadu. Many N/V restaurants have this name.).
It is one of those many andhra style hotels in Bangalore run by someone from hosur, which feeds umpteen software professionals in our area, with good sambar and better dosas.The back bone of this mess are four important persons, originally it was 3 now a new member has been added.They are the heroes of this post.
As anyone can guess almost all the work is done by these four important persons, whose total age will not be more than 55(As is the case in most small scale hotels in restaurant especially those who came from TamilNadu, Andhra).Guessing some fictional name is getting tougher for me, ideally I would like to call them A,B,C,D.But for the ease of reading say they are Rajini,Vijay,Ajith,Simbu, names of 4 heroes of TamilNadu, they are also heroes in their own way.
Rajini is the eldest among the four may be in his mid teen.He is the most matured of the lot, and who has started to learn the R&D of his profession the cooking one of the finest arts I would say.And Vijay is somewhat similar to the tamil hero vijay , is a naughty boy who often bullies Ajith by his words and makes fun of Ajith.This thirteen year old speaks funnily and freely may be often over stepping the limits to the customers.Ajith is not as smart as Vijay, often gets annoyed and angired by Vijay's comments , but who deserves most attention of the above three.Ajith is almost always serious,sad,angry, there are reasons for his behaviour, and has just now promoted. The new joinee Simbu is the youngest of all, but shows great maturity, patience and has taken Ajith's position.
Enough of description of our heroes, I went for breakfast Vijay who is one of the two servers, which is a better job amongst them, took order .Vijay a short guy , his forearms strengthened by the daily 4.00 A.M to 10.00 PM work went in brought me the ordered idlis.His and his mates' day started well before five hours, where my day was just 1.30 hours old.Though many would think , I am sympathizing for them, I am not that kind-hearted guy, but I am surprised of these guys.
Ajith is a cleaner in that hotel, would not look great may be i should tell he will look ugly, like Vijay his tender body strengthened or hardened by his daily rituals.Now you would have understood why this was guy was so sad,angry.He is one of many children who are badly affected by the inferiority complex, and his mind was repeatedly wounded and infuriated by Vijay who is doing a superior job.Though Vijay is doing it unknowingly or just for the fun(The only way in which they can make fun of), it greatly affects Ajith, and his inability to answer the smart and at times paining comments is making the matters worse.Ajith who does not get kind words from the customers too, locked himself into a shell . I often try to smile at him, thats the maximum i can do to him.
Rajini is very matured at his fifteen itself, knows what is he doing understands the situation.These things we often see in our life, what is special in it you may ask.I did not write this post to tell this , but to see an other perspective of the whole picture.
I came back from office at around 10.00 PM after having done a great deal of work (!) . And earned more than 1k for my 8 hours of work.I went to our mess to have dinner, that is the best place for dinner for some one like me , who does not like anything modern and will always stick to the same old "meals"."Meals" hear means rice sambar and that usual menu with rice.The floor there was always wet, as many guys keep walking there with wet slippers.
And all of our heroes walk without slippers there for hours, Ajith passed by me to clean the table next to me . I saw his feet, it was looking terrible after having roamed around that wet place for hours.This was common for all the four.Thank god nowadays they wear slippers atleast.These are all usual things.But something unusual had happened that day.Ajith was unusually sad should have wept some time back.And the owner as one may think him as an arrogant fellow is not that arrogant he is a normal guy like us who take these things lightly.
Then slowly , by the words of the owner the story for that extra ordinary evening started unfolding.Ajith was sent to the shop to buy something and he went for the video games shop and spent quite some time there.This was the crime committed, it does not look too sad or sympathizing event.But it moved me.I started realizing what they were missing.I never felt anyone misses something , whatever they miss or seem to miss will be gained in other ways.
But now my theory's base started crumbling after seeing this.Often we see many child laborers, we often feel them that they do not get education and cannot go to school, they work too much.According to me missing study is not one of the worst fate, I feel they know more than me in life for sure. They may not be knowing what is a software, and what all the magic those so called high end technology do, but they know what is more required for living.They have seen lots of things which we can never get.We are not convinced without examples , so here is an example to prove that they are better than most of us a in one aspect , they all know 4 languages (Tamil,Telugu,Kannada,Hindi), I did not know more than two languages at that age, even now I don't know four languages fully.
So not going to school is concerning me , then what is concerning me?. I am concerned about their lack of play time. That is what they really miss so much. I cannot sight anything wrong with Ajith he was striving to spend sometime as a kid or child.I often feel that kids should not be forced to study. I could not find any alternative for their missing of their one hour of play each day.
Why are they coming to work in such places for money? Can money solve the whole thing? With money can we give an hour time to play for the likes of Ajith, Vijay,... I have been thinking this, I am not sure whether that was the only hurdle in providing them that play. If at all more money can do this, I wish to earn a lot of money and make it happen. Will I make it happen after earning all those money? I am asking myself, without getting any answer.
Why I wrote this post? Any thing is going to happen because of this post? Good question to answer , I want to share an incident which affected me so much with others. This answer seems to be a more noble answer.But more fitting answer would be , I wrote this to show others that I am too kind to others, and I am concerned about the society. Showing off though is not considered as one of the noblest traits of human, it gets many things done, we shall discuss this when i get time to make another post.
Bye for now..............

Monday, September 17, 2007

Twenty20 , Fast life.

After that controversial topic , i have chosen to write a blog about cricket on which i have at least spent 20% of my time so far.This time i have not chosen to write about something from an unknown territory , and the ball is back in my court.

If it had been any other time i would have written about sachin tendulkar only.And it would have been an other blog , praising sachin's awesome cover drives , incredible straight drives , uncanny and cunning drive to fine leg and those sixes of warne .But this time i am lured by Twenty20 the new and revolutionary form of cricket .

Twenty20 is fast , exciting , no moments to be missed every instant becomes important.This thrilling form of cricket brings more crowd and they are all excited.The first match of Twenty20 world cup westindies vs southafrica match delivered what ever was expected of a twenty20 match.The belligerent Gayle smashed the first century of this form of cricket , Gayle showcased the power factor of cricket .
Twenty20 is ODI with just 2 piece and everything else has been stripped off.The reason for the whole excitation is that we can see a "whole" cricket match in 3 hrs . There is no slog overs like in ODIs .We do not have time to look at those wicket taking abilities of the bowlers , we do not have much time to have a look at doosras and googlies , outswingers , inswingers etc.
For around the last 13 years (that is when i started following cricket) ,ODI cricket was a game of many factors which made it an interesting game , bowlers have to take wickets and stop runs too , batsmen have to bat through the overs and score runs too.In a match till some point batsmen respect bowlers and then there is a compromise between them in middle of the match , and then an assault on bowlers when bowlers respect batsmen . This at least gave three dimensions for the game.And each of these factor had influenced the game very much.

Twenty20 is an one dimensional game , if u are a batsman u just have to think of scoring runs and nothing else , if u are a bowler u have to think of finishing your quota of overs with giving away minimum runs as possible. Bowlers cannot bowl out 10 batsmen in 20 overs , so does not have to concentrate much on taking wickets and if they do not give away more runs batsmen will get out themselves.And 20 overs is a short period to worry about saving wickets and batsmen have to hit whatever is being bowled at them.

Most balls bowled were of fuller length and many deliveries down the leg side, with a few short deliveries , not many conventional good length deliveries , which was hit to six with power and fearlessness.Be it spinners or the faster bowlers the art of conventional bowling were missing. Batting standards are also highly modified . Timing and placement were ( are) once highly rated batting qualities , but in Twenty20 how far u can hit the ball (longest sixes) and how fast u can hit the ball (speed off the bat) became the interesting factors .

The evolution of cricket from a multidimensional a bit longer game to an one dimensional game very short game , makes me think of how our life is changing . The aim of T20 is just to see what we wanted to see.The assumptions made here are we get what we want , or what we think we want.In this version of cricket we actually miss out the skill of innings building during middle overs , which decides most ODI's result. Similarly we miss out so many things on the course of life , we decide that many important things around as unimportant , and restrict our views to that . If T20 is going to be the future of cricket future generations might miss the other parts of cricket without being exposed. Analogously we pass a restricted view and a more of an one dimensional world to our future . We wanted to see cricket , soon it will be not cricket but a new game in the name of cricket .

Recently i read a small story , the source may give some what different meaning to the actual content that is the unfortunate thing with us , we give more important to the source from where it came rather than what it says.I feel that the story is worth saying .

Friends studied in a college , decided to meet together 10 years later in their old principal 's house.They started talking about their life in the past 10 years , they talked about so many things , the topic changed towards their work and how hectic it is .Almost everyone felt that the work is hectic , no time ,worries , fatigues ,etc etc.The principal did not give any reply , he went inside and brought coffee in a kettle. In the table in front of them there were so many cups made up of different materials made up of cheap plastic to expensive glasses . All the cups were clean.Once the principal brought the coffee everyone started picking up the cups . They all picked up the expensive and very good looking cups . The principal said , this is the reason for all of your sorrows. The students glared at the principal in confusion. Principal continued we pay much attention to extra things , such as these cups not paying attention to what we really want to have (i.e coffee) . We started living for these cups which fully deviates from the original intention of drinking and enjoying the taste of the coffee .

A short story but tells much . One should not advise anyone , i do not intend to advise either . But you can consider this .

Thursday, September 6, 2007

Love ? hmmmmmmmmm .......

All is well that starts well.Yes I also got a perfect start.My first blog which was supposed to tell about me was not actually intended to tell anything.But it seems that i had told more than what i wanted to, even to an extent some people started guessing my signs (moon or sun i do not know) and all.I failed to meet the objective.And so it is a failure.

How did it become a perfect start?...........

Failure is indeed the perfect way to start ( at least that is what i believe ).That is how my life had been all these years , I always started with failures and getting better from then onwards.It is better to find mistakes at earlier stages than to find it on later stages , so i assume or happily believe this is indeed a perfect start.I proceed to write my next blog after the perfect start i got.

As i told i want to tell what i feel about "love".Everyone knows how powerful this word is ,our cinemas have portrayed well enough.This word has caused many kingdoms to fall and wars were on and so many heroics great poems.Lots and lots of poets have illustrated their views through excellent similes born from their incredible imagination.

After all those people what do i have to tell about this?............ I thought , decided i have some different views about love.

Even after that i still had doubts whether am i qualified to tell ( meant i am not in **love and i have never **loved), convinced myself saying we are always being given a view through the colored glasses by those who are *qualified*.

Love surely elucidates the power of human mind.Love is very powerful just because we think it is . As everyone says love is great.Love is just a over magnified and heavily amplified by continuous repetition of "i love her / him" to ourself.Thats how it is getting so powerful.I do not find any other reason than this.Somehow they come to a conclusion that no one can be a better match than their lover.But i think everyone in this world is unique and no two exactly makes perfect pair.We come to a conclusion of this perfect partner based on very few factors of the life.
Some may argue that love expects nothing , true if you expect nothing from anyone will surely be as good a partner as your lover.It depends on the individual how do they take it.

If both of them feels they are the perfect pair , then thats fine lets say there is no one better and lets believe they are always going to be like that till their end of life.
But when one of them does not fell the same , saying love and she/he is the only one i can think of and cant think of anyone else is not sagacious.If at all god has made only one perfect match for everyone then that person is not yet found, and have got to move on.I personally feel that thinking of someone and saying i am satisfied with her/his thoughts is as good as, i think my selves as harry potter and waiting for ginny and magic will do whatever i want, and i live with just that.

All these claims make sense only if my assumption love is about finding a perfect match.
If that fails then everything becomes less complex and the only conclusion is that "Love is the best and most respectable quality of human being, and we can love anyone .So we shall love all live well.

All i have said is just what i feel and not to hurt anyone , everyone has their own feelings i respect what others feel , still if that hurts anyone i am sorry.I am always open to discussions ,post your views too.

The obvious question which will arise is that , why am i so obsessed with love ,any love failures? No . But i had so many loves or i would say i preferred some girls to be my wife, surely i wont call that as love .

Tuesday, September 4, 2007

About me .......

As this is my first blog i will tell about myself.

About me?

That is the best and worst question to be answered.I love to think an answer for this question ,but till now i have not found any convincing conclusive answer for this question.However i will tell whatever i have found out about myself.As everyone else my character is also a mixture of good and bad.But unfortunately they are equally stronger and have have great influence on me and my actions.
I am controversial person , surprisingly i am a controversial person to myself.The one thing i am sure about my character is i am straight forward person , it has given more bad results than good.
Still i want to be like that.And about my life so far so good and will always be good, because god has given and will give everything for everyone at least equally good things.So i do not want to complain about what i did not get.As i have seen the ugliest part of money and its power over human minds in earlier part of my life i do not care about money, thanks for god for taking such a decision.
My friends circle is small and i want it to be small.Girls ... hmm i will tell about this in later blogs.My opinion about love ? this also needs more words.Then what else ? yeah i am a so called software engineer working in bangalore.
I told i am a controversial character but has not proven my point and here is an example,
I feel being with people (parents ,friends ,relatives..) is the best way to live,but i like to be alone..
Bye see you soon.May be about love we will talk .............